Harry

“Why did we have to dress all in black?” Nick asks, confused as to why I insisted on the three of us not ‘standing out’. Nick’s lent me a black sweatshirt and a pair of his black jeans that are only staying up through a combination of one of Charlie’s belts and some sort of miracle.

“It’s fun, init,” I reply smoothly, making Charlie giggle. It’s no wonder I used to have a crush on him at school.

“Come on, old man, enjoy it. How often do we get to go on an adventure like this,” Charlie teases Nick.

“ Old man ?” Nick asks, flabbergasted, causing Charlie to giggle again.

“Stop flirting you two, we have things to do. I want to get my own clothes back so my meat and two veg can get a bit of support again.”

“Ewwwww, too much in- Wait, Harry are you freeballing in my jeans?!”

“I couldn’t wear the same pair of boxers 3 days in a row now could I. I’d already turned them inside out.”

Charlie bends over in a fit of laughter causing Nick to swat his arm. “Hey, it’s not funny,” Nick pouts, causing Charlie to laugh even more.

Groaning, Nick says, “Let’s just get this over with.”

As we approach the house, I see that dad’s car isn’t outside – that’s a good sign, hopefully my Mum’s out too and we can get in and out without another fight. I don’t want that, not in front of more of the people I care about.

We make it to the front door and I use my key to unlock it, as I’ve done hundreds of times before. This time it feels different though, it feels like it could be the last time. I feel like I should be sad about that, and I guess part of me is, but I also feel a sense of relief. I can finally be my true self, I no longer have to hide or put on a performance to be what my father expected me to be. Growing up, I never dreamed that one day I could be out and proud, seeing a man I love.

As the door opens, we hear a loud crash. At the other end of the hall, I can see my Mum and the remains of a tea tray smashed across the hallway rug in front of her.

“Mother, what’s with all that racket,” comes the familiar voice of my father from the living room. Before she has a chance to reply, he comes lumbering out of the room, his back to us. “What have you done now Mother, clear this mess up,” he growls.

My Mum just stands still, shocked to see me standing in the doorway. Seeing her eyes are fixed over his shoulder instead of at him, my father turns around. The second he catches sight of me and my friends, the anger becomes clear in his eyes. “I thought I told you not to come back here,” he growls, “we don’t want your sort here.”

Trying not to show how scared I am, I speak as calmly as I can, “We’re here to collect my stuff.”

“I don’t think so,” he barks, “I paid for that stuff and I’m not letting some queer have it.”

“You don’t frighten me, Dad,” I say, hoping he can’t see through the façade I’m trying to put on.

“Oh yeah,” he snarls before he starts plodding towards me with his fist raised. I brace myself for a punch, my eyes closing.

Charlie

“I don’t think that would be wise, Mr Greene,” I say as I step in front of Harry and grab hold of his fist in the air. “You see, I know a thing or two about the law, and if you lay a hand on my friend, I will personally make sure he presses charges for assault and a hate crime. Especially considering you’ve already called him ‘some queer’ and in the presence of witnesses, too.”

I’m not sure where this bravado has come from, but I’m running with it. I lower his fist with my hand before continuing, “Now, what you are going to do, Mr Greene, is go back into your living room and let your son collect his belongings in peace.”

“And what if I don’t?” Harry’s father hisses at me, trying to intimidate me.

“If you don’t, I will call the police and have you arrested for threatening behaviour,” I say with all the scary calmness of my sister Tori. Without saying another word, Mr Greene skulks off into the living room, leaving us all standing shocked in the doorway.

Harry’s Mum stays frozen to the spot throughout the altercation I’ve just had with his Dad. I look over my shoulder at Harry and quietly say, “Talk to her.” But just as he goes to speak to her, his father’s voice booms from the other room, “Mother, get in here!” With a sad look towards Harry, she scurries along quickly to her husband, closing the door behind her so that we’re left alone in the hall.

Nick speaks up from behind us, wonder in his voice, “Char, that was amazing!”

“No time for that, Harry lead the way,” I instruct.

Harry

I guide my friends up the stairs to what I guess is now my former bedroom. I’m surprised when I open the door to find everything is exactly the way I’d left it. There’s dirty clothes scattered around the floor, my posters of the England rugby team blue-tacked to the walls and mementos of my favourite memories spread around the room. It’s overwhelming to see all my childhood memories being laid bare in front of me. How can I possibly pack up my whole life in one trip? 

As if he senses I’m struggling, Charlie takes charge again, “Right,  I’ll grab your clothes and pack them up. Harry, you and Nick grab anything else you want to take, ok?”

“Yes, Sir,” Nick and I say in unison, causing Charlie to roll his eyes.

Nick lifts the suitcase he’d been carrying and heaves it up onto the bed. He unzips it and pulls out the extra bags stuffed inside so that we can get to work packing up all of my stuff. It’s tough deciding what to keep and what to leave behind.

The posters can stay, I don’t need them when I don’t have my own walls to put them up on. I can also leave behind a few of the knickknacks I’ve collected from trips with my parents over the years – I don’t want too many reminders of them when they were the ones that kicked me out.

As we all pack up my things, I ask, “Hey Charlie, how come you knew all that legal stuff before, I thought you did something boring with books.”

Charlie replies, “I’ve been an editor on a number of crime novels, the authors like to use a lot of legal sounding language. I’ve no idea if any of it is actually true, but I learnt a long time ago that if you sound like you know what you’re talking about, most people will believe it.”

Nick is grinning at his boyfriend when I say to him, “Pretty and Smart, you best marry him Nick before someone else snaps him up.” Nick’s jaw drops while Charlie just giggles. 

Nick

I’d been thinking about proposing for a while now, but the thought never occurred to me that Charlie might leave me for someone else. Not until now that is. I’m starting to panic; of course Charlie could have his pick of guys, so why would he want to settle for me. I’m just a big rugby idiot.

As if sensing I need him, Charlie comes over and places a comforting hand on my bicep. Looking into his eyes, I don’t know how but I know we’re going to be ok, something in Charlie’s eyes just tells me that he’s as gone for me as I am for him. 

Clearing his throat to remind us he’s still here, Harry announces, “I think I’ve got everything guys.”

After a pause, Charlie removes his hand from my arm and turns to Harry “Great, looks like between us we can carry all this in one trip – especially with Captain America over here,” he teases, pointing to me. We each grab as much as we can carry, and sure enough with me carrying more than my fair share, we manage to heave it all down the stairs in one trip. Just as we’re about to leave, Harry’s mother appears from the kitchen – the door to the living room is still shut.

“Mu-” Harry starts before she places a finger against her lips to ssh him. Moving quietly down the hall so that his Dad can’t hear what is going on, she silently slips a piece of paper into the pocket of Harry’s hoodie before placing a soft kiss against his cheek.

“Mother, where’s my tea?” echoes Mr Greene’s controlling voice from the living room.

“Just coming, Father,” she calls over her shoulder before scurrying back to the kitchen. Harry could only watch after her. Once she is out of sight, he follows us back to my car. None of us speaks as we load up all of Harry’s worldly goods into the boot. Charlie and I let Harry just sit and process everything that just happened.

Harry

Once we’re all sitting inside the car, I reach inside my pocket to pull out the piece of paper that my mother slipped inside. Opening it up, I see the handwriting is shaky, much different than her usual neat and precise writing. She’d clearly written it in a rush so that my father didn’t discover her writing it. It simply says:

Coffee Morning

Next Wednesday

My Mum wants to see me, she was reaching out, I felt numb. Was this a good thing? After everything, do I want to see her? Can I see her? I’m so wrapped up in my thoughts that I don’t notice we’ve arrived back at Nick & Charlie’s home until the car door beside me is opening.

“Harry, we’re home,” Charlie speaks softly next to me. But I can’t move, I’m just staring at the note in my hands. After that everything is a blur.

🎄🎄🎄 A short time later… 🎄🎄🎄

Nick

“How’s he doing?” Charlie asks as I walk into the lounge.

“I don’t really know, he’s not said a word. I managed to get him tucked into bed, hopefully sleep will give him a chance to process what he’s going through.”

“Did you give him the sleeping pill, like I suggested?”

“Yes,” I say sarcastically.

“Good boy,” Charlie smiles, kissing me as I sit down next to him on the sofa.

“I can’t imagine what he’s going through, Char.”

“Me neither, I know better than anyone that coming out isn’t always straight forward. But I never once had any doubts that my parents would accept me.”

I squeeze Charlie tight to me, I hate everything that happened to Charlie when we were younger. I know I wasn’t there when it happened, and that I can’t change the past, but it still hurts to think of anyone upsetting the love of my life.

“What do you think his Mum wants?”

“Hopefully she doesn’t agree with his Dad and just wants to try and be a part of Harry’s life.”

“I hope so, too. But what if it goes wrong, Char, what if his Dad catches them, what if-” I start spiralling.

Placing both hands on mine, Charlie interrupts me, “Nick. Nick, listen to me. We don’t know what the future may hold, none of us can know. But we can promise that whatever happens, we will be there for him, ok?”

“Ok,” I take a breath as I stare into Charlie’s eyes.

“Whether he chooses to see his Mum or not is his decision to make, we can’t make it for him. But we have to support whatever he chooses. Promise me, Nick.”

Rubbing the back of my neck, I nod, “I promise.” I know Charlie’s right, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.

“Come on,” Charlie says as he nods towards the stairs, “Let’s get some sleep.”

Nick

“How long is he staying here?” Charlie whispers to me.

“I don’t know, but I could hardly turn him away, could I?”

“It’s very easy actually, Nicholas. You just say ‘sorry we haven’t got the room!’” Charlie demands while still trying to keep his voice down.

“But he gave me those sad puppy dog eyes.”

“Surely he could have stayed with someone else… anyone else .”

“He said Jay offered, but he didn’t want to put their relationship under pressure when it’s still so new.”

“Well, that’s sweet, but still… why us ?” Charlie sulking is far cuter than I think he intends, but I won’t tell him that.

“We’re the only ones who know the real him, Char. He’s not come out to anyone else yet, he needs people who understand at least some of what he’s going through,” I plead, hoping to win him round.

“Fine!” Charlie groans, “But we are not having sex while he is sleeping on the other side of our bedroom wall!”

“What!?”

“You heard me! I’m not having him high-fiving me the next morning for ‘giving it to you good ’ or whatever other bro phrase he might decide to use.”

I pout, hoping it might change his mind, it always works when he does it to me. “Nope, it’s not happening, Nicholas,” Charlie insists. Before I can beg him to change his mind, Harry is leaping over the back of the sofa and squeezing himself in between us.

“What’s not happening?” Harry asks.

“Oh, erm, my publishing house used to host a New Years brunch but they’ve cancelled it this year – something to do with budget cuts,” Charlie lied badly, I try to cover my smirk with my hand. If he’s choosing to deny me sex during sexy Christmas, he deserves a little awkwardness.

“Mate that sucks,” Harry replies earnestly, clearly oblivious to my boyfriend’s terrible lying abilities.

“ Or not ,” I mutter under my breath. If I’d known Charlie would cut me off, I’d have thought twice before agreeing to let Harry stay. I just have to wait Charlie out, he loves sex just as much as I do, he’ll have to cave at some point… right?

Charlie

It’s not that I don’t feel bad for Harry. My coming out was far from smooth, but I’ve always been grateful that at least my parents always accepted me for who I am. There was never any doubt about them sticking by me. It’s not even because he was one of my biggest tormentors when I was outed back at school after someone overheard Tao discussing it. It’s because this was supposed to be our time alone, just me and Nick.

Between Christmas and New Year, the school where Nick works is closed for the holidays, so I always take time off from my job at my publishing house so that we can be together. Once Christmas Day is over, usually alternating between the Nelson and Spring households each year, we’ve fulfilled all of our seasonal family obligations. So, from Boxing Day until New Year’s Eve, we get to shut out the outside world and just enjoy being us. Usually that involves a lot of sex – in every room of the house; but it seems thanks to Nick’s altruism this year, our tradition has been foiled.

🎄🎄🎄 Earlier that morning… 🎄🎄🎄

“Oh Nick, don’t stop,” I pant as Nick’s mouth surrounds my cock. I’m moaning as I grip onto his hair, gently pulling as he bobs up and down my shaft. “Nick, fuck! I’m so close.”

Lifting off for a moment, Nick gasps, “Let go baby, let me taste you,” returning quickly to my throbbing cock in front of him. The sight of my Rugby Lad between my legs after a stressful time at my parents place is all it takes before I’m thrusting up to meet Nick’s lips and spilling my seed deep into his throat. Once he swallows every drop, I let Nick gently suckle on my deflating member until it becomes too sensitive for him to carry on. Popping off my now flaccid dick, he crawls up my body, placing sweet kisses along the way until our lips touch.

The kiss is soft and gentle, our tongues lightly brushing against one another. Nick’s showing off the strength in his upper arms as he holds himself just above my body; I’ll forever be grateful for all his years of rugby training coming in handy in our bedroom. Between kisses, I reach down for Nick’s still-hard cock but he bats my hand away.

“You haven’t cum,” I protest.

“Later baby,” was all he replied before pressing his lips against mine more forcefully this time.

* Ding Dong *

The unexpected chime of the doorbell startles Nick, causing him to drop, his whole weight landing on top of me. The shock of his whole weight on top of me causes me to let out an involuntary groan. “Nick! You’re crushing me, you giant rugby idiot,” I pretend to protest. I’ve never minded feeling all of Nick’s naked body against me.

“Sorry,” Nick says, rushing to climb off the bed, “Who can that be?”

I grab hold of Nick’s arm to stop him leaving, “Maybe if we ignore it, they’ll go away.”

* Ding Dong *

“It doesn’t sound like they’re going away, Char,” Nick says, always pointing out the obvious. He pulls his arm away and reaches for a pair of tracksuit bottoms that he discarded on a chair in the corner of the room. “You stay here and I’ll go see who it is,” Nick said, opening the bedroom door.

Sighing, I say, “Get rid of them and hurry back.”

Nick

I rush down the stairs as the doorbell chimes again, “I’m coming, I’m coming,” I call, though they probably can’t hear me through the double glazing.

Opening the front door, I’m surprised to find Harry standing on the doorstep, his clothes wet from the snow that’s falling. “Harry? What are you doing here? Come inside from the snow.”

“Thanks mate,” Harry says as he walks in, shaking off what little snow he can from his coat so that it doesn’t all end up on our hallway carpet.

I close the door and look my friend up and down, “You’re soaked through, you’ll catch your death, let me get you a cup of tea?”

“Urm, yeah, thanks,” Harry says, uncharacteristically shyly.

He follows me into the kitchen and takes a seat at our small kitchen table while I put the kettle on. Leaning back against the kitchen counter while the kettle boils, I ask, “So, not that it’s not great to see you but… we weren’t expecting to see you today, were we?”

“No mate, I just… didn’t know where else to go,” Harry says softly; this is a side of him that I’ve never seen before. He’s so much more subdued than normal.

Placing the cup of tea in front of our unexpected guest, I get myself settled into the seat next to him before asking, “What happened Harry?”

Taking a sip of his tea, which must be far too hot to drink, Harry starts, “I walked here.”

Confused, I ask, “From your parents place?”

“No, from Jay’s,” Harry replies, not looking at me. “He doesn’t know I left.”

“What happened? Did you two have a fight?” I ask, concerned for my friend and his first proper relationship.

“No, mate, nothing like that,” Harry pauses and takes a breath before continuing, “We spent Christmas at my folks’ place yesterday.”

Harry stops talking and as much as I don’t want to push, it’s obvious that Harry is having an unusually hard time finding his words right now. I know I need to let Harry set the pace, years of therapy sessions proved to me that sometimes you just need to sit and let the words come at their own pace.

After a few more sips of his tea, Harry sounds so dejected when he says, “I told them.”

“You… oh ,” I reach out and place a hand on Harry’s, trying to reassure him that I’m not going anywhere, and that I’m here for him.

I hope when Harry looks up he can see my genuine desire to be whatever he needs right now. “I’m so sorry Nick, for the way I treated you and Charlie, especially Charlie, all those years ago,” Harry breaks down in tears, his head falling to his hands. I stand up beside him and pull him in for a hug while he’s still sitting down, letting the man sob against my bare chest as I hold him tight.

“Hey, it was a long time ago, you’ve apologised to us both before, we’ve forgiven you.”

As his breathing gradually gets under control again, I release him and move back into the seat beside him. “I was such an awful prick, I never realised how bad I was, until…. fuck, and Jay was there too. He had to see that, why did I do that,” Harry berates himself.

“Take a step back a minute, forget the past with me and Charlie. What happened yesterday?”

Sighing again, Harry starts from the beginning, “I’d invited Jay over to Christmas lunch with my parents, his family disowned him and he didn’t have anywhere else to go. He was fine with us just being mates in front of my parents, and I don’t know if I was going to let them think that or tell them the truth but then my Dad started calling you some… not very nice names…and I told him to stop… but then,” Harry pauses again, clearly pained reliving the memory.

“Then, when Jay was explaining how he worked for the Royal Ballet company, I felt so proud of him, but my Dad… he called him a… a… fairy , and I just lost it.”

“What did you do?” I ask, fearing what he might say next.

Looking down at the table, fingering the grain of wood on the surface, he continues, “I punched him. I told him that I wouldn’t stand for anyone saying anything bad about Jay. I told him that we’re together and that I love him.”

“You love him?” I don’t mean to just blurt it out, but I’m shocked at how deep Harry is in with Jay when they only just met a few months ago.

“I do,” Harry smiles for the first time since he arrived. The smile quickly fades as he continues, “It’s all a bit of a blur after that, my father threw us out and then I was back at Jay’s, I spent the night there. But you know it’s all so new between us, and I know he told me he loved me too, but I didn’t want to put that pressure on us when it’s really too soon for us to think about living together, so I left him a note and just started walking. I didn’t know where to go and then I found myself here.”

“Wait, hold up,” I say, holding up my hands to stop him talking, “You left your boyfriend a note!”

“Oh, did I mess up again?” Harry asks, earnestly.

I resist the urge to roll my eyes, it’s clear he wasn’t thinking clearly when he did it, but a note… really? “Call him, Harry, call him and explain. I think I get why you felt you had to leave, but you need to talk to him, so he knows that you’ve left his place and not him .”

“Yeah, ok,” Harry agrees, “Cheers, mate.”

“Niiccckk, sweetheart, are you coming back to bed?” Charlie coos as he walks into the kitchen wearing nothing but a cheeky smile.

“Fuck, Harry! I didn’t know you were here,” Charlie screams, covering himself up and quickly rushing back up the stairs as I collapse with laughter at the table.

🎄🎄🎄 Back on the sofa… 🎄🎄🎄

Charlie

“So, how did it go with Jay?” I ask, trying to move the subject away from my terrible lie.

“Oh right, yeah, he understands – and he agreed with Nick that I was an idiot for just leaving a note and not talking to him. I mean, guys, I honestly was not thinking straight this morning. He’d literally blown my brains out of my cock last night and I don’t think I’d quite come back to earth when I left his place.”

“Dude!” Nick says, not needing to know that level of detail of Harry’s sex life. I can’t help but chuckle at how embarrassed he gets hearing about anyone else’s sex lives. He was the same when Darcy decided to overshare about their love life with Tara.

“What?” Harry shrugs, smirking at us, “It’s not like you two don’t have sex all the time! We’ve all heard you at house parties!”

Harry holds his hand up to high-five Nick, but when Nick doesn’t take the bait, he turns to me. I happily oblige, because we have come out to more than our fair share of wolf-whistles after sneaking away to be alone at our friends’ parties, making Nick groan again.

“He’s not wrong?” I tease.

“So what’s the plan now then?” Nick asks, probably hoping Harry would have things all worked out and would be gone within the hour so that we can get back to our post-Christmas traditions.

“Not sure mate, but you’re cool if I crash here for a bit right?” Harry says, slinging his arm over Nick’s shoulder like they’ve been the closest of mates for years.

“Er, yeah, course,” Nick replies automatically, never able to say no to anyone in need. I’m sure one day I’ll come home from work to half a dozen random animals all over the place just because Nick felt bad that they didn’t have a home. It’s a good thing school’s here don’t have class pets, or we would also most certainly end up taking in the school hamster after it had been tormented by year 4.

“I’ve set up the spare room for you, it’s pretty comfortable as Nick’s mum picked out all the soft furnishings,” I tell him, secretly wishing it wasn’t as comfortable now we might face the prospect of a long-term house guest.

“Awesome, mate, cheers,” Harry hesitates before continuing, “There’s one other problem.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, so, I kinda left my folks place in a bit of a rush and… well this is all I have,” Harry blushes, gesturing to the clothes he is sitting in.

“Ohhh,” I coo as I understand what he’s saying, “Well Nick’s clothes will be a bit big even on you, but I’m sure we can find something you can wear until we figure out how to get your own stuff.”

“How kind of you to offer my clothes, Char,” Nick teases.

“Well he’s hardly going to fit in mine, is he, Nicholas?”

Harry

I smile at the easy banter between Nick and Charlie, maybe one day I’ll have that too. I know it’s early days for me and Jay, and I’m not stupid, I know first love doesn’t always last – but seeing the two of them, their true love, their first love, it gives me hope for the future.

🎄🎄🎄 After Dinner 🎄🎄🎄

“So, I’ve been thinking.”

“Don’t hurt yourself,” Nick interrupts, although I can tell there’s no menace in his voice.

“Oi,” I prod him, causing us all to laugh. “I was thinking about when we could go get my stuff.”

“We?” Nick and Charlie ask in unison.

“Well it’ll be easier with three, especially if we want to be in and out quickly.” I explain. “You see, tomorrow my Dad should be back at work, and my Mum, well I’m hoping she’ll be out at her weekly coffee morning at the church.”

“Tomorrow! That’s so fast,” Charlie exclaims.

“I know, it’s just, I wouldn’t put it past my dad to throw away all my stuff just to prove a point,” I say it quietly while looking down at my hands. I’m embarrassed to call him my dad and to admit that I could really picture him doing that, if he hasn’t already.

Nick seems deep in thought for a moment, before jumping out of his seat to reply, “Okay, well we’ve got a couple of suitcases in the loft. We can take them with us, along with a load of other bags so you can throw everything inside and then sort through it once we get back here, sound good?”

“Sounds great,” I readily agree. I really hope we don’t have to face either of my parents after what happened yesterday, but especially not my dad.